I came across this series of books that were recently written and published on Amazon.
I had to read all three!!!!
I have read probably every book and most articles about cuckolding over the last 12-15 years.
The topic of being a cuckold is an obsession of mine.
This is because I am a cuckold. It is in my DNA. It took me so long to accept it and live happily with this part of me.
I highly recommend this 3 book series on understanding the who, what and why of cuckolding. The author speaks from experience having a cuckold husband and being a cuckoldress herself. They have been in this type of relationship for over 7 years and she communicates a great understanding of what a cuckold is as well as a cuckoldress.
I also recommend any wannabe cuckold to share the wife edition with your wife. I hope to get mine to read it too even though we are already in a cuckold relationship.
She does a great job describing the differences between swinger relationships, being a hotwife, and being a cuckoldress. As well as the internal struggles and rewards for both the husband and wife.
I once read a question from a guy: How do I get rid of my cuckold fantasies?
I thought to myself, fuck… well for me it is impossible.
In my personal experience I was very conflicted early on because I wanted to understand why I am sexually the way I am. So different than what was taught to me as societies norms for a male.
In this book the author puts it this way.
“Just like sexual orientation, you were born this way. You can’t stop it. You can’t change it. You owe it to yourself and your wife to embrace it and deal with it head-on.”
This is SO TRUE! I remember my wife telling me early in our relationship. Just enjoy it, you are not hurting anyone, you don’t have to understand it, it is just sexually part of who you are. Think of all the fucked up shit people are into, it is not that bad of a thing you get off by your wife being with other men.
As you know I describe my feelings as cuckold cravings. They have always been there and they will never go away. The thing is at the time I don’t think my wife had a full understanding, it was and is not just about her having sex with other men. I love the humiliation, the sexual teasing, the feelings of inadequacy. That is what makes me a cuckold, not a guy into swinging or hotwifing. I can’t turn it off and on.
“The real cuckold’s drive is born out of two reasons and two reasons only. One is out of deep love to see his partner have sexual pleasure at a level he can never provide. The other is deep-seated need to be masochistic.”
A masochistic derives sexual gratification from ones own pain or humiliation. They also enjoy activities that appear painful and tedious. I can say this is both true for me. I love having sex with my wife but often I think to myself I get greater sexual gratification when we don’t have conventional sex. I love when she cuckolds me! I love when she teases me! Slaps me in the face! Tells me my small cock is not enough! Has sex with me like a female! Has me use toys on her and fuck her like I can’t!
It just gets me off!
If you have read any of my writing you know my wife is my everything, my queen, my sex goddess. I put her on a pedestal and I have a deep love to see her have sexual pleasure at a level I can never provide with out the help of toys, roll-play or a bull.
In the wife’s version of the book the author also puts it this way.
“Your husband did not choose to be this way. Cuckolds have a masochistic side that runs through their DNA, just like you have blue eyes or green. No decision to have a certain eye color is ever made. It just is.“
“Sexually, emotionally, mentally, physically and even spiritually. The sex aspect is only a portion of the picture. To a cuckold he has ZERO interest in having sex with other women. He is laser-focused on his wife and his wife only. “
This is the most interesting part of this book to me. The author details that for husbands like me. Cuckolds, it is not just about the wife having sex with a bull. Yes, that is a huge part of the turn-on and fun. But it is a daily need, that is what makes it a cuckold relationship. It doesn’t just stop after sex.
“The husband is a masochist and the wife has to be a sadist. The wife needs to enjoy inflicting emotional pain. In some deep way, you know it’s wrong, but it feels so good. It caresses your soul so seductively. This is the complete opposite and complementary side of cuckolding that is a mandatory requirement for this kind of relationship. Your husband is an emotional masochist. He wants you to withhold sexual gratification from him and yet get yourself pleased by another man, usually while he suffers in frustration. He wants you to humiliate him and treat hime like he is your little bitch. He loves when you spend money to buy sexy outfits to impress other men, not him. And you? You love doing all of it to him ”
Now this is part of the puzzle that is probably often missed. You can be a cuckold but your wife may very well not be a sadist. If she is it is a perfect paring of opposites and you have a cuckolding relationship.
“You are a masochist through and through. Your wife is a sadist. You like to receive emotional and mental pain. It not only turns you on more than anything else, it also feels as natural as breathing.“
As natural as breathing. In your DNA!
“Unlike most marriages, cuckolding requires the couple to openly admit the ugliest side of themselves (at least as judged by the vanilla world) and have their partner completely accept, embrace, admire and prefer this side. Where the magic happens is that it works both directions.“
I do not know if my wife prefers this side? That will need to be answered. I do know she has completely accepted my dark side, has embraced it and does admire me for my honesty, my openness and the ability to be myself. Having my wife accept this side of me has been one of the greatest loving gifts she has given me. It makes me feel so grateful to have her, so loved and our connection together so strong.
“She loves to fuck, often. She wants to be a slut but has repressed, perhaps even buried it her entire life. She enjoys being a bad girl and gets a kick out of making you her little cuckyboy. Most importantly, she loves that you are not only okay with her being this way; you worship her BECAUSE of it.”
It is a key to an amazing marriage. We often laugh when people talk about how her and I are so happy and seem so in love after so many years. We don’t tell anyone our secret but we both know our cuckold relationship is a big player in our happy sex life with each-other.
“You love the idea of your wife being a sex god to all men. You can think of no better way to live than by her being in complete charge of your sexuality. You love that she has a dark side and worship her when she tells you that your little pee pee is cute but that she needs a real man.“
on the flip side
“Telling the man you love that you would like to fuck other guys is just plain mean. But, if you have that sadistic side, it will kind of turn you on. You may be nervous or scared, but also a little exited. In going through this very simple exercise, your heart will ultimately give you answers that may seem wrong but feel oh, so good. You need to enjoy inflicting emotional pain. In some deep way, you know it’s wrong, but it feels so good. It caresses your soul so seductively. This is the complete opposite and complementary side of cuckolding that is a mandatory.”
The true cuckold and cuckoldress don’t just do this as a lifestyle for fun. It is a ton of fun! But the true cuckold and cuckldress do this because it is part of who they are. They do it because it completes them as a person. It closes their internal loop of how their ideal life should be.
The advanced edition goes more into where cuckolding can lead. Things like chastity play, sex toys, female power – the husband doing more of the house work, making all the dinners, doing much of the laundry, becoming the wife’s princess. The extra fun the wife can have with the husbands support like hair blows, getting nails done, shopping, going out without him. Things like the male wearing only panties, getting a tattoo, cleaning up after the bull, sucking cock, what the neighbors think, what to tell the kids.
It does a great job laying out the options there are in the advancing stages of Cuckolding which many my wife and I have advanced through slowly with small steps over many many years.
To end I highly recommend these books. These are the first books I have ever written about, I thought they were that good! I do not know the author, never met her or chatted with her, I came across them on amazon searching for cuckold erotica like I often do. You can get them here: https://www.amazon.com/Allora-Sinclair/e/B08TB2554J/ref=dp_byline_cont_pop_ebooks_1
I wish they were around when I first started having my cuckold cravings. They would have really helped me better understand myself and reading them today they still have given me better understanding in agreeing with much of what she says. I have known I am a masochist for a very long time. I had never thought about the connecting piece of the sadist. I had never looked at my wife as a sadist, I do know, when I think about it, I can tell deep down she does enjoy it.